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 Arkansas Governor ApplicationArkansas Governor Application     First name:___________________Last name(if known):_______________________ Address (where you live): Mother's name(list also relation, i.e., sister):__________________ Birthdate(yours):____________________ Father's name (if known, if not, list two possible choices)______________ Color of neck: Light Red( ) Medium Red( ) Dark Red( ) No Neck( ) Year of pickup truck:____________ Do you have the following in your truck:                                   Fuzzy Dice( )  Gun Rack( )  Coon Tail( )                                   Filled ash tray( )  Used Condoms( )                                   Dead Road Kill( ) Dog of Unknown Breed( ) Have you ever been to a large city? (Like Little Rock) Yes( ) No( ) How far can you throw cow pies?__________ Do you eat cow pies? Yes( ) No( ) Wife's name:__________________ Is she: Cousin( ) Neighbor( ) Sister( )                                        Mother( ) Neighbor's dog( )                                        Right hand( ) Does your wife weigh: Less than 200 Pounds( ) Less than 300 Pounds( )                       Less than a 747( ) More than a 747( ) Do you know what a 747 is? Yes( ) No( ) How much smarter than you is your wife:                 50 IQ Points( )   75 IQ Points( )                 100 IQ Points( )  She Won't Tell Me( ) Does your wife wear:                 A Dress( )     Pants( )   Hot Pants( )                 Your Pants( )  Them Lawyer Clothes( )                 Nothing( )     Nothing but an Arkansas U Hog Head Hat( ) Color of wife's hair:  Blonde( )  Red( )  Brown( )  Black( )  Bald( ) Did you understand the previous questions:                 Yes( )   No( )   What does "previous" mean?( )                 Huh?( )  All of the Above( ) Have you ever had: Herpes( ) Jock Rot( ) The Drip( ) Roids( ) Zits( ) (Check all that    Smelly Feet( ) Toe Jam( ) Bad Breath( ) Tit Munge( )  apply)            Ear Wax( ) Long Nasal Hairs( ) Brown Nose( ) Have you ever: Castrated a Pig( )  Been Castrated by a Pig( )                Danced to Achey Breaky Heart( ) Had an Achey Breaky Heart( )                Been Mistaken for Elvis( ) Had Fantasies about Toto( )                Had Fantasies about Dorothy and Toto( )                Had Fantasies about Gilligan( )                Had Fantasies about Gilligan and the Skipper Too( )                Inhaled( ) Where was your last Elvis sighting?________________ On what date?___________ Can you count past five: Yes( ) No( )  Past ten: Yes( ) No( ) Explain in ten words or less why on Earth you want to be Governor of Arkansas:  Signature (or 'X' if you can't write)________________________________ 
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